Single Black Female

I haven't written in a long while, mostly because I had so much to say that I couldn't really organize my thoughts to my liking. Recently, however, I had an experience that I can't seem to get out of my head. It was actually something that I was surprised I had escaped for as long as I had. During Thanksgiving, a loved one was "badgering" me about being single.

I've been trying to convince myself that I mistook his concern and desire for me to be happy for a slight. To be fair, we've never had an adversarial relationship and he's family so I don't believe his intention was to be hurtful. Nevertheless, I took it personally and felt attacked because the question "Why don't you have a man" made me feel as though it was my fault that I am single...and that being single was wrong. Upon further contemplation, I came to realize that it's not my "fault" that I'm single.

It's not my fault that many men don't realize that I have wide hips to birth a nation and an ample bosom to feed a nation.

It's not my fault that they don't know that my behind is round to cushion the 7 times I fall so that I may rise 8, or that my plump thighs...well that's just for his comfort

It's not my fault that men don't overstand that my nostrils are wide to smell the b.s. that Babylon slings my way to break my spirit

It's not my fault that the fellas don't recognize that my nappy hair and melaninated  skin protect me from the climate, a climate that is charged with words and behaviors intended to demoralize, denigrate, discourage, and generally break me

Nah, it ain't my fault.

I'm not single by choice, and I am single by choice. There's a man out there who's seeking what I have to offer, but he's unique himself. So, I guess my reply is that it's not that I "can't get a man," it's that some men just don't get me.