Lately, I've had the desire to get back into the dating scene. I had put it on hold until I got more settled into my new area and made some new friends. A year and a half later, however, my life is still in a bit of flux and I haven't really solidified meaningful connections with people yet. So my thought is; if it is this challenging to make new friends, what are my chances of finding a suitable beau?
I asked for advice from some friends. Some were married, others are in the dating world. They advised me to go on matchmaking websites to find love. It's not a surprise that dating in the 21st century has taken to the web, but it is a bit daunting. There are hours worth of forms to fill out, and one never knows who is being truthful on them. You are being matched by a computer program that can never really get the true essence of a person. It is a little scary because you could be matched with a serial killer or some other kind of criminal. I really hate trying to write a paragraph that sums up who I am. I don't know if I'm the type of person who's match would be found on one of these sites.
What happened to making connections with people while out and about in the world doing the things you enjoy? Are people so busy that they can't even be bothered to get to know the things that are on these online forms for themselves? I mean, dates still need to take place to make a real connection anyway, right? Do online dating sites really make a more perfect or near perfect match than meeting someone at a museum or grocery store? It just seems awfully impersonal, even clinical to me. But I'm told it has worked for some people, and it seems to be the current method of dating.
Not too long ago, I watched a movie called "Arranged." It was about an Orthodox Jewish woman and a Syrian Muslim woman who teach at the same school. They find common ground through their religious commitments and realize they have both been committed to an arranged marriage. It's not the type of arrangement where their husbands have been pre-selected and they meet on their wedding day. They meet with different men who are selected for them and they get to choose who they want to marry. I found it difficult to find fault with this process. How great would it be to have people who know and love you find suitors for you! Many people have disagreed with this process for many years, but in today's world of computer dating, I think I would prefer it.
I would be open to any suggestions on finding a suitable mate. If there are any of you who know me who know someone that might be a good match, I'm open to it. Making connections of any sort seems to be quite a task these days. We all seem to be inside of these boxes that keep the rest of the world at a distance. What are we so afraid of? It seems to me that life would be easier and more pleasant if we would let down our guards and let people into our personal worlds. I'm interested in your thoughts. Peace and blessings.
I think internet dating can be fun. Just beware of what sites you choose! True, I never did meet anyone 'suitable,' but it got me back in the dating world at a time when I was depressed and lonely. Funny that I DID eventually find true love on the internet, but it wasn't a dating website. I found a French website for my favorite band (GROUNDATION!), wrote a Thank-You note to the webmaster (Those French classes paid off!), and after several years of internet friendship based on a common interest (!), the webmaster is now my boyfriend, Antoine, and we go back and forth from California to France making it work. Its definitely not an easy process, but putting yourself out there (in a romantic sense) is worth a try these days. You'll be surprised! <3
ReplyDeleteYour story is inspiring because your connection was made through a common interest (Groundation is the best common interest btw) and endures across continents. I was in a long distance relationship for 7 years...it takes commitment. I wish you both the best. Thanks for your response.
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